[form] SELF HELP REBT WORKSHEET This form is for doing a complete Rational Self Analysis on a troublesome issue Your full name:[text,r_name,50] Email address:[text,r_email,30] ================================================================================ REBT self-helping Journal The (A) or ACTIVATING/TRIGGER EVENT Please describe what started things going for you in terms of feeling the negative emotions or moods. USE this checklist to check and make sure you've covered all the aspects of the A (Activating Event) [checkbox,WHAT happens]1. WHAT happens (What is said or done) [checkbox,WHERE you are]2. WHERE you are when it happens [checkbox,WHOM you are with]3. WHOM you are with. [checkbox,HOW often]4. HOW often this Adversity happens. [textarea,the A or setting of my event is,4,70,Write your A in here...] Identify the Goal GOALS in terms of REBT are about you wanting LESS of something, MORE of something, wanting to COMPLETE something. I want LESS of [textarea,I want LESS of,3,70] I want MORE of [textarea,I want MORE of,3,70] I want to COMPLETE [textarea,I want to COMPLETE,3,70] ================================================================================ IDENTIFY the Feelings When you feel disturbed you are emotionally reacting to your beliefs or expectations about the situation you are experiencing. ASK YOURSELF: "HOW do I feel (C) after experiencing this Adversity (A)?" CHECK the feelings experienced and indicate how intense those are using the pulldown menu [list,Anger-Intensity][option,0,intensity][option,Not at all 0%,0% Not at all][option,10%,10%][option,20% A little,20% A little][option,30%,30%][option,40%,40%][option,50% Medium,50% Medium][option,60%,60%][option,70% A lot,70% A lot][option,80%,80%][option,90% Quite a lot,90% Quite a lot][option,100% Most Ive ever felt,100% Most I have ever felt][/list] [checkbox,Anger] Angry Rage Irritated [list,Anxious-Intensity][option,0,intensity][option,Not at all 0%,0% Not at all][option,10%,10%][option,20% A little,20% A little][option,30%,30%][option,40%,40%][option,50% Medium,50% Medium][option,60%,60%][option,70% A lot,70% A lot][option,80%,80%][option,90% Quite a lot,90% Quite a lot][option,100% Most Ive ever felt,100% Most I have ever felt][/list] [checkbox,Anxiety]Anxious Scared Worried [list,Depressed-Intensity][option,0,intensity][option,Not at all 0%,0% Not at all][option,10%,10%][option,20% A little,20% A little][option,30%,30%][option,40%,40%][option,50% Medium,50% Medium][option,60%,60%][option,70% A lot,70% A lot][option,80%,80%][option,90% Quite a lot,90% Quite a lot][option,100% Most Ive ever felt,100% Most I have ever felt][/list] [checkbox,Depression]Depressed sad listless [list,Shame-Intensity][option,0,intensity][option,Not at all 0%,0% Not at all][option,10%,10%][option,20% A little,20% A little][option,30%,30%][option,40%,40%][option,50% Medium,50% Medium][option,60%,60%][option,70% A lot,70% A lot][option,80%,80%][option,90% Quite a lot,90% Quite a lot][option,100% Most Ive ever felt,100% Most I have ever felt][/list] [checkbox,Shame] Shameful Embarrassed Vulnerable [list,Jealous-Intensity][option,0,intensity][option,Not at all 0%,0% Not at all][option,10%,10%][option,20% A little,20% A little][option,30%,30%][option,40%,40%][option,50% Medium,50% Medium][option,60%,60%][option,70% A lot,70% A lot][option,80%,80%][option,90% Quite a lot,90% Quite a lot][option,100% Most Ive ever felt,100% Most I have ever felt][/list] [checkbox,Jealous]Jealous [list,Envious-Intensity][option,0,intensity][option,Not at all 0%,0% Not at all][option,10%,10%][option,20% A little,20% A little][option,30%,30%][option,40%,40%][option,50% Medium,50% Medium][option,60%,60%][option,70% A lot,70% A lot][option,80%,80%][option,90% Quite a lot,90% Quite a lot][option,100% Most Ive ever felt,100% Most I have ever felt][/list] [checkbox,Envy]Envious [list,Guilty-Intensity][option,0,intensity][option,Not at all 0%,0% Not at all][option,10%,10%][option,20% A little,20% A little][option,30%,30%][option,40%,40%][option,50% Medium,50% Medium][option,60%,60%][option,70% A lot,70% A lot][option,80%,80%][option,90% Quite a lot,90% Quite a lot][option,100% Most Ive ever felt,100% Most I have ever felt][/list] [checkbox,Guilt] Guilty Remorse [list,Hurt-Intensity][option,0,intensity][option,Not at all 0%,0% Not at all][option,10%,10%][option,20% A little,20% A little][option,30%,30%][option,40%,40%][option,50% Medium,50% Medium][option,60%,60%][option,70% A lot,70% A lot][option,80%,80%][option,90% Quite a lot,90% Quite a lot][option,100% Most Ive ever felt,100% Most I have ever felt][/list] [checkbox,Hurt]Hurt Disappointed Impacted HOW appropriate were they to the situation? [radio,emotappropriate01,Very Appropriate] Very Appropriate [radio,emotappropriate01,Somewhat Appropriate] Somewhat Appropriate [radio,emotappropriate01,Somewhat Inappropriate] Somewhat Inappropriate [radio,emotappropriate01,Very Inappropriate] Very Inappropriate DEALING effectively with FEELINGS [checkbox,Feeling Replacement] Replacing inappropriate negative feelings with appropriate manageable feelings. (a) Be aware that you are thinking (B) about the unfair event (A) and see that you are creating negative feelings (C) by your thinking. (b) Tell yourself that you can STOP thinking about this event and CAN think of other Activating Events (A's) instead. (c) Force yourself to thinking of a different Activating Event (e.g. being treated fairly by someone) (d) Frequently practice directly replacing your undesirable feelings with more pleasant feelings by thinking about desirable activating events. REDUCTION techniques [checkbox,reduce intensity] REDUCE INTENSITY Gauge how intense then work on lowering that intensity by stages and discover what you say or think to do that. Spot absoltue terms like: Should, Must, Ought, Never, Always. [checkbox,reduce duration] REDUCE DURATION Spot what you are doing that maintains the length of time. e.g. Labelling it as AWFUL, TERRIBLE when it's not totally so; Telling yourself you can't handle it when you really can but not without frustration or discomfort. Change your deamnds to preferences. [checkbox,reduce frequency] REDUCE FREQUENCY Use the same techniques as for reducing duration. Give yourself permission to feel that way less times in the day than you presently do. Challenge destructive thinking. ================================================================================ IDENTIFY THE BEHAVIOUR WHICH words describe your actions? [checkbox,avoiding]Avoiding [checkbox,withdrawing] Withdrawing [checkbox,screaming]Screaming [checkbox,drinkingsubstances]Drinking or substances [checkbox,hittingpeopleobjects] Hitting people or objects [checkbox,yelling] Yelling [checkbox,aggressive] Aggressive [checkbox,driving] Driving or Controlling [checkbox,arguing] Arguing [checkbox,sulking] Sulking [checkbox,sleeping] Sleeping [checkbox,complaining] Complaining [checkbox,talking] Talking [checkbox,crying] Crying [checkbox,eating] Eating When encountering your Adversity Event, what behaviours best describe your reactions? [textarea,My comments on behaviours,3,70,When enountering (A) my behaviour (C) is best described as...] HOW appropriate were they to the situation? [radio,bhvappropriate02,Very Appropriate] Very Appropriate [radio,bhvappropriate02,Somewhat Appropriate] Somewhat Appropriate [radio,bhvappropriate02,Somewhat Inappropriate] Somewhat Inappropriate [radio,bhvappropriate02,Very Inappropriate] Very Inappropriate WHAT would be a more appropriate SELF-HELPING behaviour? [textarea,self-helping behaviour,3,70] WHAT are the ADVANTAGES of this SELF-HELPING behaviour? [textarea,advantages of self-help behaviour,3,70] ================================================================================ IDENTIFY YOUR BELIEFS CORE TYPES OF MUST BELIEFS See which of these are present and what your personal versions are. 1. “I must perform well and/or win the approval of important people or else I am an inadequate person.” This often leads you to feel anxious, depressed, and worthless and to avoid “risky” pursuits. 2. “You (other people) must treat me fairly and considerately and not unduly frustrate me or else you are a rotten individual!” This tends to create anger, rage, fury, feuds, wars and genocide. 3. “My life conditions must give me the things I want and have to keep me from harm or else life is unbearable and I can’t be happy at all.” This tends to produce low frustration tolerance, depression, procrastination, and addiction. When I experience the (A) and the (C) I believe and tell myself (keep in mind the 3 types above) [textarea,I tell myself,3,70] IDENTIFY the MEANINGS you give when triggered What does this adversity mean about YOU? [textarea,meaning about self,2,70] What does this adversity mean about your LIFE? [textarea,meaning about life,2,70] What does this adversity mean about OTHERS involved? [textarea,meaning about others,2,70] IF you INSTEAD thought rationally or self-helpingly about the above, HOW would you tend to FEEL and BEHAVE? [textarea,rational thinking impact,5,70] What KEY activties will help you do this? [checkbox,fully accept myself] FULLY Accept myself by resisting self-downing and rating behaviours instead. I COULD DO THIS BY... [textarea,accept myself by,2,70] [checkbox,resist self labelling] RESIST self labelling or rating I COULD DO THIS BY... [textarea,resist self downing by,2,70] TRY listing on two sheets of paper FIRST ON ONE the disadvantages of self-labelling and downing THEN ON THE OTHER the advantages of rating behaviour instead of person? [checkbox,avoid demands and musts] AVOID DEMANDS as in MUSTS SHOULDS OUGHTS that allow for no failure I COULD DO THIS BY... [textarea,avoidng demands by,2,70] [checkbox,avoid awfulising] REDUCE AWFULISING as in exaggerating the degree of badness of my situation by assigning an appropriate level of badness I COULD DO THIS BY... [textarea,reduce awfulising by,2,70] [checkbox,raise frustration level] RAISE FRUSTRATION LEVEL by recognising how truly urgent it is that I feel comfortable and solutions arrive quickly. I COULD DO THIS BY... [textarea,raise my frustration levels by,2,70] ================================================================================ YOUR ongoing work now, will be to negotiate homework assignments to help establish this new belief in practical livable ways IF you experiencing difficulty or a block in working this form, please place your query to the Counsellor in this final comment box and you will be contacted and assisted. [textarea,difficulties,3,70,My block or difficulty with my work on my underlying rules is...] [checkbox,send copy]Check this box if you wish to receive a copy of this form by email [submit,SEND this Journal][reset,Start Over again] [/form]