[form] "The REBT Toolbox" Your Name please: [text,r_name,30] Email: [text,r_email,30] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Identifying the Behaviours So far you have focused on your disturbed feelings (C) but you haven't done too much about your destructive actions and behaviours. (These behaviours, as well as feelings, comprise the C in the ABC's of REBT). Behaviour describes what you are doing or how you are acting. Just as feeling is one way you respond to your Activating Events, behaviour is another way. Just as you focused on your feelings, you can now focus on your behaviour. Look at the following words that describe behaviour. This list may help you to find some words that describe your feelings. BEHAVIOUR LIST Avoiding hitting arguing talking Withdrawing yelling sulking crying Screaming aggressive sleeping eating Drinking driving complaining. Using your choice of the behaviour words listed above or your own words, complete the following sentence. When encountering this Activating Event, my behaviour is best described as... (Example: "When going for a job interview, my behaviour is described as talking too rapidly") [textarea,my behaviours,3,70] How appropriate is your behaviour to the Activating Event or Adversity that you described above? select one [radio,appropriate,Very appropriate] Very appropriate [radio,appropriate,somewhat appropriate] Somewhat appropriate [radio,appropriate,somewhat inappropriate] Somewhat inappropriate [radio,appropriate,Very inappropriate] Very inappropriate If your behaviour is either somewhat or very inappropriate, you can use REBT to change it. The first step is admitting or "owning up to it" when it is self-defeating. The second step is identifying the advantages of changing the behaviour and deciding what behaviour would be more appropriate. In this situation, a more appropriate self-helping behaviour would be... example: "Forcing myself to talk more slowly even though I feel anxious.") [textarea,selfhelping behaviour instead,3,70] The advantages of changing my self-defeating behaviour include... Example: "If I talk more slowly on a job interview, I will give better answers, make a better impression on the interviewer, and increase my chances of getting the job.") [textarea,advantages of change,3,70] Replacing your less desirable behaviour with more desirable behaviour is helpful because (a) It reduces your self-defeating tendencies: (b) It encourages you to change some of your irrational Beliefs (iBs). Thus, if you stop drinking or smoking, you will tend to change your iB's, "I must drink when I have the urge to do so!" and "I am so anxious that I can't stop smoking!" Changing your iB's leads you to a more enjoyable life. You have identified the Activating Event or Adversity, and your self-defeating feelings and behaviours about it. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Questions or Comments? [textarea,questions or comments,3,70] [checkbox,send copy,checked] To receive a copy of your work here. Uncheck it if you have printed off a hardcopy for yourself. [submit,SEND this Entry][reset,Start Over again] [/form]