Cognitive Self-Help Toolbox Cognitive techniques are for adjusting the expectation side of the quadrant. Essentially most of our efforts to adjust or solve an upset have a cognitive component, in that sense this approach is more directly cognitive than the behavioural suggestions that follow. Here are some additional tools that will help you deal with stress and develop a functional coping philosophy. Most of the techniques in this and the next two sections can be used either alone or as part of completing a rational self-analysis or a CBT Journal Stage 3. Reading Check out the self-help library in the Website Keep educating yourself about the world and the people in it. Get information on particular problems from sources like books, magazine articles, pamphlets, and the internet. The Online Counsellor website has a library of well written essay-Ebooks on topics that are helpful. Rational cards After disputing a self-defeating belief, take a small card and write the old belief on the top and the new belief at the bottom. Carry the card with you for a week or so, and take it out of your pocket or purse and read it eight to ten times a day. This will take less than thirty seconds each time, but the repetition can be very productive for establishing a new rational belief. Don't be misled by the simplicity of this technique - it can be surprisingly effective. Note that a new thought requires daily practice for about twenty-one days before it becomes a habit, so refer to the card at least once a day for a few more weeks. Catastrophe scale You can request a link for a form to work this kind of self-help from the Online Counsellor This is a technique to get things back into perspective when you find yourself awfulising. On a sheet of paper draw a line down one side. Put 100% at the top, 0% at the bottom, and fill in the rest at 10% intervals. At each level, write in something you think could legitimately be rated at that level. You might, for example, put 0% - 'Having a quiet cup of coffee at home', 20% - 'Having to mow the lawns when the rugby is on television', 70% - being burgled, 90% - being diagnosed with cancer, 100% - being burned alive, and so on. Whenever you are upset about something, ascertain what rating you are (subconsciously) giving it and pencil it on your chart. Then see how it compares to the items already there. Usually what happens is that you will realise you have been exaggerating the badness involved. Move the item down the list until you feel it is in perspective. Keep the chart and add to it from time to time. The Online Counselling website has forms prepared to work this particular aspect. Reframing Ask the Online Counsellor about REFRAME a fairly new approach to helping see things differently This is another strategy for getting bad events into perspective. One way to reframe events is to re-evaluate them as 'disappointing', 'concerning', or 'uncomfortable' rather than 'awful' or 'unbearable'. Another way is to see that even negative events almost always have a positive side to them, listing all the positives you can think of. Costs - Benefits calculation There is a form available for you if you request such from the Online Counsellor This helps you explore the gains and shortfalls of going for short-term pleasure or hanging in for long-term pleasure. It is a way to break through decision-making blocks. It is based on the principle that we are likely to be happiest when our decisions take into account both the desirability of getting enjoyment now, and continuing to get it in the future. To carry out a calculation, list all the factors that seem relevant to the decision. Include the likelihood of short- and long-term consequences for each factor. Decide how much value or benefit each item has to you, negatively or positively, then add up the pro's and con's.