1. I need love and approval from those significant to me, and I must avoid disapproval from any source. 2. To be worthwhile as a person I must achieve, succeed at whatever I do, and make no mistakes. 3. People should always do the right thing. When they behave obnoxiously, unfairly or selfishly, they must be blamed and punished. 4. Things must be the way I want them to be, otherwise life will be intolerable. 5. My unhappiness is caused by things which are outside my control, so there's little I can do to feel any better. 6. 1 must worry about things that could be dangerous, unpleasant or frightening, otherwise they might happen. 7. 1 can be happier by avoiding life's difficulties, unpleasantness and responsibilities. 8. Everyone needs to depend on someone stronger than themselves. 9. Events in my past are the cause of my problems, and they continue to influence my feelings and behaviours now. 10. I should become upset when other people have problems and feel unhappy when they're sad. 11. I shouldn't have to feel discomfort and pain. I can't stand them and must avoid them at all costs. 12. Every problem should have an ideal solution, and it's intolerable when one can't be found. Exercise 12 Decide which of the 12 irrational beliefs is reflected by each of the ratings/personal meanings listed below. Write the number of the belief alongside each one. The first two have been completed as examples. [form] Name[text,name,30] Email [text,email,30] SAMPLE ANSWERS ARE GIVEN IN 1 AND 2 1. Because I was put down as a child, I can never have confidence in myself. [list,q1] [option,0,Rule 9] [/list] 2. He's a real bastard for doing that. He should be put away for good. [list,q2] [option,0,Rule 3] [/list] 3. I'm not getting the encouragement and support I need to even survive in my job, much less do it properly. [list,q3] [option,0,Choose which distortion is present] [option,1,Rule 1] [option,2,Rule 2] [option,3,Rule 3] [option,4,Rule 4] [option,5,Rule 5] [option,6,Rule 6] [option,7,Rule 7] [option,8,Rule 8] [option,9,Rule 9] [option,10,Rule 10] [option,11,Rule 11] [option,12,Rule 12] [/list] 4. How can I be happy with a wife like I'm married to? [list,q4] [option,0,Choose which distortion is present] [option,1,Rule 1] [option,2,Rule 2] [option,3,Rule 3] [option,4,Rule 4] [option,5,Rule 5] [option,6,Rule 6] [option,7,Rule 7] [option,8,Rule 8] [option,9,Rule 9] [option,10,Rule 10] [option,11,Rule 11] [option,12,Rule 12] [/list] 5. I've got a pain in the stomach from worrying about the way my son may turn out. But I can't just ignore his behaviour. [list,q5] [option,0,Choose which distortion is present] [option,1,Rule 1] [option,2,Rule 2] [option,3,Rule 3] [option,4,Rule 4] [option,5,Rule 5] [option,6,Rule 6] [option,7,Rule 7] [option,8,Rule 8] [option,9,Rule 9] [option,10,Rule 10] [option,11,Rule 11] [option,12,Rule 12] [/list] 6. This self-help stuff is just too hard. I must find an easier way. Why can't my doctor give me some pills? [list,q6] [option,0,Choose which distortion is present] [option,1,Rule 1] [option,2,Rule 2] [option,3,Rule 3] [option,4,Rule 4] [option,5,Rule 5] [option,6,Rule 6] [option,7,Rule 7] [option,8,Rule 8] [option,9,Rule 9] [option,10,Rule 10] [option,11,Rule 11] [option,12,Rule 12] [/list] 7. I can't stand the way my girlfriend handles her money. Why won't she let me show her how to do it properly? [list,q7] [option,0,Choose which distortion is present] [option,1,Rule 1] [option,2,Rule 2] [option,3,Rule 3] [option,4,Rule 4] [option,5,Rule 5] [option,6,Rule 6] [option,7,Rule 7] [option,8,Rule 8] [option,9,Rule 9] [option,10,Rule 10] [option,11,Rule 11] [option,12,Rule 12] [/list] 8. When he hurts, I have to hurt. That's what love's all about. [list,q8] [option,0,Choose which distortion is present] [option,1,Rule 1] [option,2,Rule 2] [option,3,Rule 3] [option,4,Rule 4] [option,5,Rule 5] [option,6,Rule 6] [option,7,Rule 7] [option,8,Rule 8] [option,9,Rule 9] [option,10,Rule 10] [option,11,Rule 11] [option,12,Rule 12] [/list] 9. I can't see the point in doing all this self-analysis. All it does is make me feel worse, so why bother? [list,q9] [option,0,Choose which distortion is present] [option,1,Rule 1] [option,2,Rule 2] [option,3,Rule 3] [option,4,Rule 4] [option,5,Rule 5] [option,6,Rule 6] [option,7,Rule 7] [option,8,Rule 8] [option,9,Rule 9] [option,10,Rule 10] [option,11,Rule 11] [option,12,Rule 12] [/list] 10. I'd end up feeling terrible about myself if I started this course and then failed. So I'll leave it. [list,q10] [option,0,Choose which distortion is present] [option,1,Rule 1] [option,2,Rule 2] [option,3,Rule 3] [option,4,Rule 4] [option,5,Rule 5] [option,6,Rule 6] [option,7,Rule 7] [option,8,Rule 8] [option,9,Rule 9] [option,10,Rule 10] [option,11,Rule 11] [option,12,Rule 12] [/list] 11. We missed the house which was our first choice. I could never be happy here or anywhere else. [list,q11] [option,0,Choose which distortion is present] [option,1,Rule 1] [option,2,Rule 2] [option,3,Rule 3] [option,4,Rule 4] [option,5,Rule 5] [option,6,Rule 6] [option,7,Rule 7] [option,8,Rule 8] [option,9,Rule 9] [option,10,Rule 10] [option,11,Rule 11] [option,12,Rule 12] [/list] 12. I'll never survive now Mike's left me. I'll have to find another guy. [list,q12] [option,0,Choose which distortion is present] [option,1,Rule 1] [option,2,Rule 2] [option,3,Rule 3] [option,4,Rule 4] [option,5,Rule 5] [option,6,Rule 6] [option,7,Rule 7] [option,8,Rule 8] [option,9,Rule 9] [option,10,Rule 10] [option,11,Rule 11] [option,12,Rule 12] [/list] Any Questions or Comments? [textarea,questions,15,50,Write in here...] [submit,SEND this Entry][reset,Start Over again] [/form]