FH Anger
Anger is a part of being human. As adults we have a responsibility to use anger creatively. The advice here is fairly general. Anger is different to other emotions in that you need to train yourself PRIOR to being triggered so that you know how to respond when you are. Other emotions can generally be worked on AFTER the event. Spot your triggers, your physical clues, the sound and tone of your voice, how you're posturing yourself.
ANGER is largely about how you choose to handle unmet expectations like someone breaking your personal rules or challenging your values.
When you feel anger rising
- NAME IT - Say to yourself "I am angry". Go to a place on your own and have TIMEOUT.
- BE ANGRY SAFELY - Talk it out, bang on a pillow, be physically active putting words into the movement. You need not damage yourself, others or objects when you express your anger.
- SIT QUIETLY - and think about your anger. What caused it? What was I telling myself? What hurt lies beneath it? What was I expecting? Say "I am angry because ... "
- MAKE A DECISION about what needs to change. Yourself? The situation? The relationship? Choose the decision that will stop the same thing happening all over again.
- MAKE THOSE CHANGES Be aware that this may take time and effort.
- FORGIVE yourself, and forgive others who are involved. This will help you to prevent the hurt experienced from getting in the way of the relationship continuing.
- AFFIRM YOURSELF for using anger creatively. Allow a feeling of wellbeing to move through your body.
Most people feel angry at some time.
It doesn't help to: - Let it smoulder away inside OR
- Explode like a volcano.
A Wise Saying:
"NEVER LET THE SUN SET ON YOUR ANGER" Ephesians 4:27
